Hair Growth For The New Generation

I have just been informed by my daughter that she is "doing the hair growth thing that everyone is talking about" to make her hair grow faster. I am sorry I asked now but let me share it with you:

1. Wash the roots of your hair with shampoo. Just the bit you can see at the front. Apparently.

2. Condition the ends of your hair with conditioner. 

3. Rub some honey into your scalp: "But I don't want to do that bit because it sounds sticky and I don't really like honey."

4. Spend 45 minutes 'inverted': "But I don't want to do that bit either, it sounds like it hurts after a while."

5. Comb your hair through with a shower comb, not a brush: "I haven't got a shower comb, so I think I'll just use the brush I have already."

6. Don't blow dry it, just squeeze the water out with a towel and let it dry by itself: "But it depends if I'm doing something important or not - I might do that bit or I might not."

Me: "So that's just washing your hair as normal then?"

Her: "Yeah but I started it a few days ago and I think it's starting to grow a bit faster already."

Me: "I think eggs and beer are supposed to be really good for your hair and making it grow."

Her: "Don't be stupid..."

Welcome to life in the fast lane.

•••

Talking of My Chemical Romance - which I happened to in the previous post - take a listen/look at Gerard Way's new tune:

This has legs that can run for miles and miles. 

And now, back to doing something constructive...

Sion Smith